Fundamentally, it seems our faith in God is founded on what we believe about who He is... His character... His will and desires... and what He's actually done to realize that. I believe, without a shadow of a doubt, that what we think about hell has a profoundly dramatic affect on everything we believe about God, ourselves, and life in general.
Can one's depravity, if you will, be so powerful it can trump God's original intent and will for mankind's healing/forgiveness/reconciliation/redemption... eternally?
My journey into the pits of hell began one day when, almost out of the blue, the startling awareness that if most Catholic/Orthodox/Protestant/Evangelical (Calvinist and Arminian) churches and theologians were correct in their understanding and teachings about hell -- and having been hit over the backside of the head with the hard and fast that my faith was a joke when it came to someone's eternal heaven/hell destiny -- than in all likelihood, 99.9% of my beautiful family members were going to wind up there, including my three beloved sons. Talk about terror.
(I mean, let's be real... my faith for something as comparatively lame as temporal physical healing left a few folks dead instead of healed, and I was going to rely on that same faith (mine) to get a loved one eternally saved? I... don't... think... so)
The revelation of that completely dismantled all my carefully-constructed defenses... all the pick and choose scripture verses and teachings I and those of my kind "stood on" for our "household salvation”... which many scholars claimed we were using improperly anyway, but we turned a blind eye and deaf ear to that. (Ha, forget about all the households where there was no believer to stand for the rest, eh?... at least my household was going to be saved, hallelujah.)
But on that day, that dreadful, glorious day, it was as if the reality of what eternal torment in hell really meant finally seeped its way into the hidden recesses of my soul... places where fear and denial had previously stood guard. I was undone. A mess. All those years of "standing in faith" dissolved into dark despair. I was defenseless.
As the horror of “hell” overwhelmed me, I cried out to God, "What can I do? Is there anything I can do? Please show me!" I was desperate. Words can't express. Out of my mind desperate. More than I had ever been about anything in my 44 years of life on this planet.
I found myself almost instinctively knee-jerk responding with the only option I found left. As insane as it seemed, it was clear at the time my only hope was to bargain with God. I cried out to Him from the depths of my being, "Please, please, please! Let me take their place, God! You have to let me take their place!"
As the horror of “hell” overwhelmed me, I cried out to God, "What can I do? Is there anything I can do? Please show me!" I was desperate. Words can't express. Out of my mind desperate. More than I had ever been about anything in my 44 years of life on this planet.
I found myself almost instinctively knee-jerk responding with the only option I found left. As insane as it seemed, it was clear at the time my only hope was to bargain with God. I cried out to Him from the depths of my being, "Please, please, please! Let me take their place, God! You have to let me take their place!"
In my thinking, one honest to goodness Jesus believer for three unbelievers had to tip the scale in my favor. I mean, how in the name of love could such a request be denied? It couldn't. Deep in my mother's heart I knew that. I knew that.
Well, smile, that afternoon was the beginning of a very long and winding road I've been on for over a decade through the veritable insanity of the various and oftentimes conflicting Christian beliefs concerning "hell". But realizing that nothing, absolutely nothing, is more important than one's eternal destiny, it became the primary focus of my life -- understanding God's intent for creating human beings, His "faith" concerning humanity -- and if that faith, that will, is going to be ultimately realized or if it can be withstood by man's finite, fallen, carnal "faith" (fear/doubt/unbelief)... or, even, the devil's.
One of the most troubling things to me is that everyone who believes in a hell of eternal torment must in some way be operating within the framework of a works mentality, whether they know it or not. Simply put, belief in an eternal hell = fear/striving/works/law. It's impossible not to. Which is why most people can't retain their sense of love, joy and peace, despite all the love, peace and joy preachers out there. Until hell gets "straightened out", it will always be lingering somewhere in the back of our minds, tormenting us. Whipping us into fear-based works that we claim are of faith and love. Talk about terrorism... belief in an eternal hell is the number one of all terrorists!
For the life of me, I don't know how anyone in their right mind and heart can be joyful, for even a nanosecond, if they actually believe there is even one person frying “for all eternity” in a place of absolute stark-raving insane terror called hell, and that they will never stop frying or being demonically, disgustingly abused, never ever. (Even though the Bible clearly declares that God will be the ALL IN ALL in "the end"... ie, God wins! Not us, GOD. But that's a point most don't seem to fathom.)
This is so real to me and for most folk I talk to it's pretty much just head stuff. "Oh yeah, hell's real... don't really get it, but it's true... you know, God's justice and all... sure, He's powerful enough to save everyone... sure, He wants to, cause He loves everybody equally... it's just that He can't... you know... free will and all. We have to just trust that He knows what He's doing."
And they are able to say this because... somehow, someway... they believe that they, themselves, have done something to be saved? That saving faith is not a free gift of God's grace, but a "choice" one makes... a decision of one's "free" will... instead of, ultimately, God's?
Which means that those who don't make the "correct choice" are exercising their "free" will to deny the most blessed and life-altering thing one could ever experience ever, ever, ever... in this life or the next? If anything, I would call that person insane. It's like me handing someone a billion gazillion dollars and them saying, "Get away from me, you idiot. What makes you think I need that?!"
After studying the subject of hell for over 12 years, I have found there is SO much to it... much more, even, than the simplicity of translations incorrectly translating the Hebrew/Greek words Sheol/Tartarus/Hades/Gehenna and those for the grave/death as "hell"... much more than studying the meaning and context of the Greek words aion/aionion, or the words and scriptures where Jesus addressed punishment/judgment/chastisement and the like (be that temporal or eternal/everlasting/forever).
Even a cursory study of the Greek word "aion" and adjective "aionion" would probably throw most for a loop... "age/eon" in some instances... "eternity/eternal/everlasting" in others... "world" in others. Yikes.
Forget the "if you're not part of our church/denomination you're going to hell" groups, of which there are many... most die-hard evangelical Christians believe that gentle, kind Aunt Clare, who everyone dearly loves, will fry forever simply because she never said the "right" words (ie, the "correct" sinner's prayer)... not to mention the poor soul who just happens to be unlucky enough to be born in a country where the gospel hasn't quite reached (whichever "gospel" that would be in order to get "it" right)... or, worse yet (in my mind), the young soul who just happens to reach the "age of accountability" but hasn't yet "chosen Christ" and then dies... oops, bye bye little 12 year old child (who might not even have ever heard the “gospel”)... to hell you go... sorry! But not, because of course that wouldn't be honoring to God. And of course there's those pesky issues of water baptism and the like.
This kind of stuff has a major impact on what we think about God, but outside of the "fire and brimstone" churches, we rarely, if ever, talk about it... let alone understand it. We just shut our mouths and close our minds and accept it "by faith". Some faith.
That kind of "faith" could find you rotting in a prison cell, out of your mind with innocent blood on your hands. As in the tragic case of Andrea Yates... who did the unthinkable by gathering up her little "under the age of accountability" babes in her arms... and then, one by one, carried them into the bathroom to the tub she had filled with water (I wonder if it was warm and rubber duckies were floating around)... where she held them under by force until they stopped struggling for their lives. (I hear the oldest fought back tooth and nail.)
I'm sure before that dreadful day that bathtub was a place the children thoroughly enjoyed... splashing and playing about in the sudsy water. How horrible is it to come to your demise in such a way, by the hands of probably the one person you trusted more than any other, in a place that had held only happy, peaceful memories? From all accounts, Andrea had been a wonderful, kind, tender mother. (My God, I'm getting sick just thinking about this. But I have to. Because of the WHY. Why would she, how could she, do such a thing?!)
From her own words, she did it because she was a TRUE BELIEVER. ("Oh, yeah, right," some snicker, "she believed." We're so foolish.) Her church not only believed what the vast majority of Christians believe, but they actually had the guts to TEACH it. Week after week Andrea was downloaded with the "gospel message"... TURN OR BURN! TURN OR BURN! GET RIGHT WITH GOD OR YOU'RE GONNA BE TORMENTED FOR ALL ETERNITY IN THE FLAMES OF HELL! (And, as we all must know, that IS the message, the ONLY message... IF IT'S TRUE.)
In light of this message that she heard week after week after week -- and, I would imagine, in light of her own particular state of mind -- how is it surprising someone akin to an Andrea would actually begin to believe the bottom line, especially as far as her own beloved children were concerned, and eventually work up the guts to do the seeming impossible by taking matters into her own hands?
We have to remember, from all reports she believed the message, it wasn't just talk to her. The church wasn't hiding it behind Door #3... out of sight, out of mind. It was in her face. And because her lifestyle didn't tend toward "worldly distractions," the message became as real to her as anything. More real, I would imagine. Eternity being eternal and all.
In light of this, why would any truly loving mother take the chance of her child not making the "right choice"... when, if she only had the guts, she could do them the blessed, eternal favor of a one-way ticket to heaven? Talk about sacrifice. What a mother. Seriously. Most Christians (including mothers), deep inside, believe exactly like Andrea did, but can't allow themselves to see the eternal implications of that belief as it pertains to their "under the age of accountability" children? And she's the crazy one?
We have to remember, from all reports she believed the message, it wasn't just talk to her. The church wasn't hiding it behind Door #3... out of sight, out of mind. It was in her face. And because her lifestyle didn't tend toward "worldly distractions," the message became as real to her as anything. More real, I would imagine. Eternity being eternal and all.
In light of this, why would any truly loving mother take the chance of her child not making the "right choice"... when, if she only had the guts, she could do them the blessed, eternal favor of a one-way ticket to heaven? Talk about sacrifice. What a mother. Seriously. Most Christians (including mothers), deep inside, believe exactly like Andrea did, but can't allow themselves to see the eternal implications of that belief as it pertains to their "under the age of accountability" children? And she's the crazy one?
I tell this tale not to cause anyone pain, thought I know it is very painful, but because something has to wake us up. Most of us are insane and we don't even know it. WHO IS GOD? WHAT HAS HE DONE THROUGH CHRIST JESUS? Does anyone really know? I hope and pray we find out before another "Andrea" takes matters into her own hands.
When I've shared this with some, they've quickly responded with the likes of, "The only reason she did it was because she was insane." And so??? Dear friends, you just don't get it. It doesn't matter if she was or wasn't. Not in the least. If anything, if she was insane it was her children's blessing! Because, if there's such a thing as "an age of accountability", as most Christians believe (understandably, to their credit... though unscriptural), Andrea accomplished what she set out to do. The bottom line is, her children are in heaven! Each and every one! For ever and ever and ever, amen! And no one can take that away from her... or them... ever. Not even God.
How many grieving fathers and mothers of sons and daughters who've passed on after "the age" without confessing Christ can say such a thing with such absolute assurance? How many of them have to do mental gymnastics in order to keep themselves from sinking down into an unending spiral of hopelessness and despair, because, deep inside, they don't really know where their child is? Help us, Father! And if there isn't such a thing as "an age of accountability"... well, then what? Have you thought about that?
(Though I never heard Jesus or the apostles preach that those under 12 had any special "get out of hell free" card. Jesus told them to let the children come to Him! Hmmm... is this "another gospel", perhaps... the kind Paul told us to be on the watch for? Like the one where we don't "really" need folks to be sent out to preach the word, because Jesus is popping up all over the place revealing Himself to unbelievers through visions and dreams and the like. ?)
(Though I never heard Jesus or the apostles preach that those under 12 had any special "get out of hell free" card. Jesus told them to let the children come to Him! Hmmm... is this "another gospel", perhaps... the kind Paul told us to be on the watch for? Like the one where we don't "really" need folks to be sent out to preach the word, because Jesus is popping up all over the place revealing Himself to unbelievers through visions and dreams and the like. ?)
I think it's high time we, the Church of Jesus Christ, started to get real. I mean, really real. Because, until we do, all we're doing is spinning our wheels, no matter how grand and glorious those wheels might be. But they will always get stuck in "eternal torment in hell". Sooner or later we're going to be finding ourselves not being able to get past "Go!" to collect our $200.
Until we start to figure this all out, we have nothing to offer the likes of all the B Team Andreas out there... those who actually believe there's such a thing as a scorching eternal hell of torment (which would be the vast majority of the church), but who can't let themselves know they believe it... at least not too much... not, of course, like poor, sick Andrea.
Until we can meet the accusation of an "Andrea" with who the God and Father of the Lord Jesus Christ really is, can we meet any other? I mean, really?
It seems if those who've tasted the goodness of salvation through Jesus Christ don't understand this, how can anyone? I mean, we've tasted His goodness. We know we don't deserve a shred of it. Or at least we should. ;)
Please, God, open our hearts and minds... to the TRUTH of WHO YOU ARE and WHAT YOU HAVE DONE through Your Incomparable Son... let it go forth throughout the entire earth. To Your glory, not ours. Amen.
With love to God, my Redeemer, and all of you,
Susan
For scriptural verification that GOD wins in the end (and therefore, so do we!) please visit The Greatest Story Ever Told. There are also some links
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